"The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes."

"If I am not for myself, then who will be for me? And if I am only for myself, then what am I? And if not now, when?"

"Life is the art of drawing without an eraser."

"I’m selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, am out of control, and at times hard to handle. But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best."

"Ah, women. They make the highs higher and the lows more frequent."

"Either write things worth reading or do things worth the writing."

(Oldie)

Lady in red has finally danced with me tonight cheek to cheek heart to heart. Only I am in purgatory half released between a clot and a need to continue. I ceased because there were no longer stop signs. Only desires in a painful pleasure of tearing down temples and building up symbols to block out the noise of knowing eyes that search me for answers not dared ask for fear of truth. I am vanishing underneath a need to set free this yearning that crawls and burns, buried not so deep, and sticks to the roof of my mouth like the finest red wine. I drink every drop of desire to strip away the flaming things. To rip open a once apple again and see what is still unsighted. It begs and cries through distorted veins in need of rest ready to rupture to peace. The lady in red found her way into my arms, she held me tight and touched me a pair of wings to fly from the space that jailed my soul away from me. And yet she is still in need. The bitch is thirsty in her red flamed dress twirling arm in arm lips in lips. She kissed me a flow of rain to drown once again, to be once again, to love beyond my limits, and to believe outside of a throb that red turns to pleasure instantly. My hero, my need, my fiend…my lady in red. ~Me

Sunday

I got a lot done today. Work was productive, I finished most of my assignments and even played around a bit. I may even work in a midnight swim…maybe. My swimming spots are limited now and the beach isn’t as safe as it used to be at night.

I’ve been asked repeated to bring Cicely back…I have no reason as of yet but would love to please my readers…I have a treat in store for them soon. Discipline is a major thing that I constantly trying to conquer…be still, put a do-not-disturb sign on my door, turn off all my gadgets and just write. What will I really miss if I shut the world out for a second? And If I do have regrets…I have something to write about.

It is true that I write from heart when creating…I need my emotions to drive me. My mind is not a creative tool…not for anything good anyway.  I’ve been working on this short story for class and it is character driven. So I walk behind Essence (that is my protagonist’s name), and I allow her to do what she will. It is amazing how many times the direction has changes. I used to hate revising…but the more I learn the more I’m loving the fact that we can revise as many times as time will allow. I see revising as additional time to make my characters shine…to make them as best as possible. I use that revising time to ask a question like…what’s the significance in you mentioning your relationship with GOD in this story…is it needed? And if so…where else can we use it or tie in the relationship. And if there is no response from the character…I take it out.

The story I’m working on now is called “Devil’s Halo,” it is sort of a coming out story but not really and the severe consequences (for this particular character) behind making the choice to come out. At least that is what is about so far.

Guess I will get back to my writing…